Dreams

Sunday 9th May, 2021

Slept well which is always a delight but with some vibrant dreams. In fact I read an article about dreams during this Covid period and they had all sorts of reasons why many are dreaming so vividly. It is quite fun to have a secondary life even if one does not recall it.

I streamed Mass from Canada and listened to a superb sermon on love. Ultimately it was about putting on love, as St Paul suggests, over all else. It binds, it gives purpose, it is the apogee of human experience. My one problem is to know how to define it, how to live it and how to apply it to a particular situation. Only recently a friend was furious with a doctor who answered her sick husband's question as to whether he was dying and how long he had with a 'yes, three months at the most'. She claimed he gave up and died within a month. Should the doctor have lied out of love? Also I am in a situation where the transparent honest answer would, I am sure, cause trauma and psychosomatic reactions. I think kindness, concern and even love trumps the honest, direct and maybe saves health. Yet.... If you asked someone ' do you like me' and they answered 'no, you are horrid and selfish' would you be grateful so as to be able to change yourself, or would you be so deflated that you would despair? And what would you say in reply to such a question?

At 11.10 I jumped in my car and drove to a friend's house. She had agreed to witness my signatures on documents. She also gave me a smoked salmon, avocado and prawn brunch. Friends are just irreplaceable, wondrous and the spark of life.

Although much rain in shower form was forecast I grabbed my litter picker, my mackintosh and ventured out for a walk at 14.00. I had not had a walk for 48 hours and felt it. Also I noticed that I was less fit as I walked. I met some old regulars and most excitingly saw six swallows and on my way back noted my six ducklings were still alive on the local Park's lake. Two bags of litter.

Since then I have been pondering mattresses, carpets, fridges and such like for my new flat. I still have not got it signed and sealed but....a new phase of life opens and it is both daunting and exciting. How fortunate I am.