Farewell good friend

Saturday 23rd May, 2020.

I have mentioned my friend Peter Youngman before. I lamented that I had been unable to visit him of late, first because of my own hospitalisation and latterly because of the lock down. He was in a Care Home in Angus and they were very particular re visitors. He was a most remarkable man, a professional opera singer and then a Minister of the Church of Scotland. He was a scholar and wrote a major work on the myths, history and language of Jura, where he was Minister for a time. This was followed by a powerful autobiography instigated by his wife. I met him at a local choir where his phenomenal voice and musicality were a great addition. I was drawn to him as a pastoral and spiritual advisor. I never know how or why one is particularly drawn by certain people...I put it down to serendipity. He lost his beloved wife over ten years ago. She had been an enormous influence and a great love and companion. I visited him in his bungalow and when he could no longer care for himself I visited him in the Care Home. I loved him greatly and his wisdom, advice and compassion as well as intelligence were an enormous boon.

He died yesterday evening of Covid 19.

Farewell good friend, may your God welcome you home.

Peter would have relished two stories I read of this morning. It is, as you know, the Eid al-Fitr festival when Moslems celebrate the end of Ramadan. When I lived as a child in  the Middle East I witnessed the remarkable self denial and the severe fasting of the Moslems, including my own nanny, and admired their piety  and discipline. I do so still. With the lock down and major restrictions on meetings I noted the act of fellowship in Berlin. It seems that the local Mosque was too small to allow all worshippers to attend because of social distancing. The Martha Lutheran Church in Kreuzberg opened itself to host the Friday prayers of Eid. The pastor welcomed them and worshipped with them. If only we all had such generosity of heart. Peter was a reconciler, a man who understood the divisions and differences of peoples yet fervently sought unity in love and compassion.

If I were visiting him today I would also have referred to the increase of 'spit attacks' on front line workers. It seems there has been a 14 percent rise in such attacks. On being interviewed by a BBC correspondent one policeman noted how it was their job to face the public in places and times of tension and crisis. He had himself been spat at. Asked his opinion he had said that he understood the frustration and fears. He was there to keep the peace, to calm troubled waters, to protect and safeguard the public. It was his job to do the best of his ability even if there was personal cost.

He relished his job.

Peter always recognised the value of self denial for the greater good. What lessons I learned from him. What a lesson I have learned from the policeman and from the pastor in Berlin.

Not just words but actions. 

#friends #loss #lessons #eid #reflection #love #compassion