Various

Wednesday 31st March, 2021

Life really is a roller coaster. I always believed one should expect the unexpected but never quite liked the idea of it in reality. Ups and downs, goods and not so goods and on it goes. Today has been an epitome of exactly that.

I woke quite excited as I was off to Church for a service of reconciliation and general absolution and followed by Mass. I had not booked but was told by email by a friend that there would be a place. There was but regulations were absolute. One sat in a designated place...fine. One wore a mask....fine. One had to sit and not follow the usual ritual of standing or kneeling...not so fine for an old buddy like me. Then the service of reconciliation...fine as we all had a sheet to follow but the priest did not follow it and he gave two sermons, unscheduled, neither of which I could decipher partly as he had a mask, partly because he has a soft voice and partly because he has a Nigerian accent. Then the Mass and Communion and out via a side door and back in to wipe and sanitise where one sat. I was a little grumpy and impatient by this time as I get very frustrated by not hearing or understanding the words of the services and sermons. However it was good to be back in Church.

I then went off to post a letter with a special gift in it for a house bound friend of mine. The post office very efficient. This was followed by meeting up with my artist friend. We spoke of the BBC4 programme on Mount St Bernard Abbey and also about the birth of a great grand child and the pregnancy of a grand daughter in law. Also I was fed fresh prawns and avocado followed by lemon cheese cake. Delicious. After I looked at three superb paintings she has done of Himalayan birch in her garden. She asked for criticism so I gave my opinion. At the end she said she was going to paint two large canvasses of Fife and the Tay for me to take with me when I go south. She wanted me to have a memento. Also she wants to paint my portrait before I leave so has asked me to spend two days with her and her husband before I depart.

It is a cold day with a bitter wind. But I grabbed my litter grabber and stormed off. Nature was healing. Somehow it gives one perspective. We are but little blips in a world and in a history of a Universe and although I think God's love for us makes us utterly priceless yet all will continue when I have gone. In fact at one point I sat on a moss covered tree trunk and noted how it was decaying and turning back in to earth. How apposite to have that letter in this Holy Week when an innocent man, a good man, a totally loving man is crucified for us. How vain one is. Indeed as Ecclesiastes proclaims ' vanity of vanities, all is vanity'. My mind rested.

I take up the story...Judas's betrayal, the Passover meal, the garden of Gethsemane, the High Priest, Pilate, crowning with thorns...on it goes. Let us realise this is happening now to many. Just read the news and read of hell on earth. What is a pathetic letter?

Once again my faith and hope have rescued me from demented nonsensical angst. It has simply been another day of good things and not so good things, a day in a life.